Change = Peace

Lately I have been looking around at my environment and thinking about other things I want. I want to move so bad, I am tired of being stuck in such a small apartment with Josh and the dog (that I'm not supposed to have). I want to be able to do whatever I want to my 'home'. Ive been looking around at houses to rent and hopefully something will become available soon. I want to have people over. I want to have BBQ's in the back yard. I want to be able to escape a crappy neighborhood. I have to double lock my door and chain it when Josh isn't around because I am constantly afraid ever since someone tried to break into our house when we were home. I want to live in a place I am comfortable in.

I want to get all my worries out of the way. Is that possible? Do people actually live there life with no worry? Man, that would be amazing! For someone who has extreme anxiety issues, a small worry is actually a HUGE worry. I constantly drive myself crazy worrying over the smallest things.

I recently had two interviews with AT&T. Well, actually the 2nd week of January. I got the job two weeks later. It's been 5 weeks since my initial interview and I have yet to find out any information about my training. They keep giving me the run around for some reason. The pay is great and it would really help me achieve my goals, but why is it taking so long? The hiring department called me Friday and told me there were some issues with my background report and she needed to speak with me. I called her back 5 times Friday and 3 times today, along with 2 emails. She never returns my calls. I am going on another interview tomorrow, b.c I have no idea what is going to happen with AT&T.

I want a job I can get settled into. I'm hoping when I graduate, this will happen. I've spent too long in school and too much money on it, not to work in my field of study. I don't want to worry about people working around my schedule, because I wont be in school anymore. I want something permanent and stable.

I'm ready for a change! I think for the most part I just want things to be smoother. I want to go about my life and not have to worry so much. I just want peace. I don't think that's too much to want.