Never a dull moment

Up, down, Up, Up, Up, WAY DOWN, WAY DOWN. This would describe the roller coaster ride of my life. I've made some changes in my life and I've had a lot of changes happen to me without wanting them.


First and foremost, I've changed my major. This may come to a shock to some, but essentially I had no choice. I couldn't afford to not work anymore and my personal life was falling apart. I've been accepted into a new program: Medical Transcription. I am VERY comfortable with my decision and I am happy this will work out. I will not detour my graduation date any. I will actually graduate earlier in this program. I just felt so helpless. My attitude changed so much since Ive started school. I became someone I didn't know. I KNOW this was the right decision for me!

Secondly, Josh got laid off. I guess if it had to happen, I'm glad I already switched majors. Now we are both looking for a job. I am having no luck so far. I have applied to over 20 places, just haven't heard anything.



Lastly, my father has been diagnosed with Basil Cell Carcinoma. I was told this wasn't that big of a deal and it was very treatable. However, my dad means the WORLD to me and he is probably the one I am closest to the most. He goes to the doctor again tomorrow to treat more of it. Also he is having a Esophagogastroduodenoscopy on Friday. (For those, not in the medical field..he is having a scope down put down his throat to make sure everything is okay.). My dad has always been like superman or iron man to me...nothing could phase him. To know something like this could happen to him or this could lead to even worse things...I am just beside myself.

I think I have driven myself into a slight depression with everything going on. I feel helpless. Essentially I feel like a loser. I think this is why I have been keeping to myself and doing things at home. I know I will eventually snap out of this, but right now, I just feel terrible. I don't mean I have the flu terrible. I just feel like I have dug myself into a hole and it seems like a decade before I can dig myself out.



I have been trying to bring myself out of it, I think I just need something to change for the better. I hope Christmas brings this out of me. I need it too! Until then, I am just going to focus on myself and turning this around. I have done this many times before and I know this time will be no different. Hopefully my spirits will be brighter the next time.